can't say that at this point in the month of ramadaan i don't wish it was over already,..the wierd sleeping pattern has taken it's toll, i'm up at 4.40am..bright as a button, (whoever believes that is crazy)..yawning and streching make my way to the kitchen, to put Sehri on the table for GDH,..and my Dad...the usual fare is a bowl of jungle oats, it can be swallowed no need for chewing, and tea or coffee, whatever the favoured poison.
me..i unpack the dishwasher, reload it for the next run, swallow some water, and bleary eyed make my way back to bed, it's a helluva long month, and if another person, wishes to recount, how wonderful and easy it is, i have a short walk to the baseball bat,..and i can use it for purposes other than hitting a ball.
as you can see, this is the month, in which i should be meditating and turning my attention to all things spiritual,..instead i am itching to use the baseball bat, it would be bliss, if you can fit the spiritual, meditative, prayer thing ,into a full work day, then cooking and cleaning up, and after the first taste of water and kajoor hits your belly, all you want to do is sigh, stretch out and sleep, then there are the maghrieb, and Isha prayers that follow, lets not forget the tarawi prayer....but let me not be untruthfull, i much prefer reading and reciting my Quran, then spending time in congregational tarawi salah, so shoot me for being an errent muslim, but some things are easier said then done.
at this point, 16h03..i am feeling the cry of hunger in my belly, and try as i might, my concentration is impaired,...and i cannot bring myself to do anything mentally challenging, i believe prayer would be included in that, so i will make my way to the kitchen, in the vain hope that preparing our Iftaar dinner would take the edge of the hunger pangs, and physical activity, will erase them as well, pity tasting the fair has to wait, oh well as you can see, a believer i am, albeit slighlty errent, not very good with completing the 5 daily prayers, but emboldened by faith and love, and all the beauty that is Allah subahana wataallah. something i read, and am now repeating here,
"I WAS A HIDDEN TREASURE AND I WILLED TO BE KNOWN, SO I CREATED THE UNIVERSE"
And that universe, is magical and perfect, and in that, lies my soul, my belief and my joy, so here i am imperfect, not outwardly perfect, but truly in love with Allah,..and the boundless blessings he bestows,..so as my stomach rumbles and i complain, i thank the Almighty for the pleasure of being able to enjoy my Iftaar dinner, and i ask that he hastens the time until dusk...
Friday, August 12, 2011
Monday, August 08, 2011
settling down....
married bliss. began in a one bedroom flat, with couches that looked like the woolly mammoth, we are now working on finalising the transfer details to our new home, who thought that purchasing a house would be a right royal pain in the ass.
show day went something like this: pouring buckets of rain, cold wet, grey unappealing day, but we run for cover and buzz the doorbell, the current owners are relocating, so the signs of packing are everywhere, on the surface the house looks fine, GDH, tries to open a window and the blind falls off, so the estate agent gets a bit antsy, which makes me blurt out to GDH, not to touch things, and thus our viewing of the house commences, me on tenterhooks, that hubby does not knock something over, he aggravated, as we should be able to touch , open, poke and prod, after all it's a show day, we never get to see the outbuildings as the weather is foul, and i am very conscious of bringing in the weather, on somebody elses property. so we have a rather cursory inspection and leave.
however the house feels like it will suit our needs, and we are keen to place an offer, before doing so, GDH, goes to inspect the property again, for major items, like the roof etc, to see that there are no big defects, satisfied, we call the agent, request the house plans, and make our offer, they only disclose one section of underfloor heating that has been out of order, satisfied with that, we don't note anything further on the offer to purchase, but we do verbally let the agent know that we will need to go around again to check for any further issues we might find, no problem they say, as the seller's are good people. we pay the deposit, and make arrangements to go to the property again.
i notice little things, like the household rubbish, old furniture, broken ladders old paint tins, it's another miserable day, and i am feeling harrassed and unhappy about this house, we don't get to see the back rooms, as the domestic worker is in there doing her cooking, grey walls, grey day, so i come home a little deflated. to make matters worse the bond application is becoming an excercise in futility, so we get the extension, and because the bond is taking longer than expected, we ask the estate agent in, to change the terms from bond, to cash/bank guaranteed payment, at that meeting i bring up, the mess in the back, and we are assured it will be taken care off, we also mention that we will inspect the house and if there are any issues, we will bring them up, for the seller to fix, no problem, we are assured all will be attended to.
the transferring attorney's, take some time in coming back to us, with the requirements for the bank guarantee, so we wait, eventually they do with some small errors, and we arrange the necessary, the estate agent keeps the commission, transfers the balance of our deposit to the attorney, then we are told that the problems we noted with the house have been there since the seller moved in,..we have still not inspected the back rooms, as on our next visit, the domestic is at a funeral and the room is locked, the rubbish is still there, apparently belonging to the domestic worker, to be moved when she vacates. so if we want repairs done, we are to pay the full market value on occupational rent, not the agreed upon amount, and we should accept things as is,so now despite the new consumer act, getting our attorney involved, and the back and forth toing and froing, we are still in transfer limbo.
apparently , Estate Agents are no better then used car salesmen, and sellers who get there price, don't give a rats ass, to ensure that the property they are selling behoves the price they are getting, there seems to be no integrity, and our fault was not checking out the house with a fine tooth comb before making the offer, but who can see unfinished plaster work behind appliances, or checks every handle on every window before making an offer, these things become apparent, once the house has been emptied.
the estate agent believes we are defaming them, i believe not,..i haven't called them crooks, i just want them to make good on the verbal conversations we had, apparently it's all here say, so we are on the take it or leave it page, oh, and if we leave it we are still to pay the agent their commission..hehehe!!!...and the consumer protection act is all hogwash, since we seem to have no recourse there, go figure that one.
GDW...just does not care anymore, i just want to have my house so i can do the setting up nest thing, found some great fabric to upholster the chairs with, and fabric for curtains..now i just need to get in there to get things done...i am dreaming paint and furniture and stoves, and a big clean up operation, however we are still at the mercy of transfering attorneys and estate agents. i understand that any home you buy is never perfect, they become what you make of them, all i want is to start my makeover, is that to much to ask?,...if there are things that the seller needs to do, why would that be so difficult....oh well, i will be patient, and wait to start building ney preparing my nest, hopefully once all this is done, mama weaver bird, will not be throwing the papa weaver out...GDH...i hope is not to concerned..:)
show day went something like this: pouring buckets of rain, cold wet, grey unappealing day, but we run for cover and buzz the doorbell, the current owners are relocating, so the signs of packing are everywhere, on the surface the house looks fine, GDH, tries to open a window and the blind falls off, so the estate agent gets a bit antsy, which makes me blurt out to GDH, not to touch things, and thus our viewing of the house commences, me on tenterhooks, that hubby does not knock something over, he aggravated, as we should be able to touch , open, poke and prod, after all it's a show day, we never get to see the outbuildings as the weather is foul, and i am very conscious of bringing in the weather, on somebody elses property. so we have a rather cursory inspection and leave.
however the house feels like it will suit our needs, and we are keen to place an offer, before doing so, GDH, goes to inspect the property again, for major items, like the roof etc, to see that there are no big defects, satisfied, we call the agent, request the house plans, and make our offer, they only disclose one section of underfloor heating that has been out of order, satisfied with that, we don't note anything further on the offer to purchase, but we do verbally let the agent know that we will need to go around again to check for any further issues we might find, no problem they say, as the seller's are good people. we pay the deposit, and make arrangements to go to the property again.
i notice little things, like the household rubbish, old furniture, broken ladders old paint tins, it's another miserable day, and i am feeling harrassed and unhappy about this house, we don't get to see the back rooms, as the domestic worker is in there doing her cooking, grey walls, grey day, so i come home a little deflated. to make matters worse the bond application is becoming an excercise in futility, so we get the extension, and because the bond is taking longer than expected, we ask the estate agent in, to change the terms from bond, to cash/bank guaranteed payment, at that meeting i bring up, the mess in the back, and we are assured it will be taken care off, we also mention that we will inspect the house and if there are any issues, we will bring them up, for the seller to fix, no problem, we are assured all will be attended to.
the transferring attorney's, take some time in coming back to us, with the requirements for the bank guarantee, so we wait, eventually they do with some small errors, and we arrange the necessary, the estate agent keeps the commission, transfers the balance of our deposit to the attorney, then we are told that the problems we noted with the house have been there since the seller moved in,..we have still not inspected the back rooms, as on our next visit, the domestic is at a funeral and the room is locked, the rubbish is still there, apparently belonging to the domestic worker, to be moved when she vacates. so if we want repairs done, we are to pay the full market value on occupational rent, not the agreed upon amount, and we should accept things as is,so now despite the new consumer act, getting our attorney involved, and the back and forth toing and froing, we are still in transfer limbo.
apparently , Estate Agents are no better then used car salesmen, and sellers who get there price, don't give a rats ass, to ensure that the property they are selling behoves the price they are getting, there seems to be no integrity, and our fault was not checking out the house with a fine tooth comb before making the offer, but who can see unfinished plaster work behind appliances, or checks every handle on every window before making an offer, these things become apparent, once the house has been emptied.
the estate agent believes we are defaming them, i believe not,..i haven't called them crooks, i just want them to make good on the verbal conversations we had, apparently it's all here say, so we are on the take it or leave it page, oh, and if we leave it we are still to pay the agent their commission..hehehe!!!...and the consumer protection act is all hogwash, since we seem to have no recourse there, go figure that one.
GDW...just does not care anymore, i just want to have my house so i can do the setting up nest thing, found some great fabric to upholster the chairs with, and fabric for curtains..now i just need to get in there to get things done...i am dreaming paint and furniture and stoves, and a big clean up operation, however we are still at the mercy of transfering attorneys and estate agents. i understand that any home you buy is never perfect, they become what you make of them, all i want is to start my makeover, is that to much to ask?,...if there are things that the seller needs to do, why would that be so difficult....oh well, i will be patient, and wait to start building ney preparing my nest, hopefully once all this is done, mama weaver bird, will not be throwing the papa weaver out...GDH...i hope is not to concerned..:)
Monday, July 25, 2011
happy with life..thanking God for small blessings
staring at the blank screen, trying to rack my brain, thinking of something interesting enough to blog about, it has been 10 months since i tied the knot.GDH..is well thank you, GDW, is contemplating the moving of our house, we have everything in storage, and are currently at my folks, not bad i might add, there is someone else to help do the cooking,...and it's a lot easier, many hands make light work.
much to my amazement GDH, is thoroughly enjoying his stay with the in laws, we have taken to nightly scrabble matches with little brother and his wife, and it surprises me, that we are so competitive, it's quite addictive,..just like marriage. my good friend Ashantha, has just accepted a proposal of marriage, so it seems that the institution is quite contagious,i can here it..love is in the air...wasn't that a Neil Diamond ditty, they love him at OR Tambo International, his crooning could be heard, as we dropped GDH at the airport for the umpteenth time, in our short but happy marriage. and yes, my sister in law..GDH'S sister that is,(the English language fails to differentiate which side of the family we are referring to)..reminded me that babies can only be made by having Sex,..for that GDH, needs to be in the country at the very least,..now that i have overcome my wedding phobia(not quite true)..i am dealing with,do we hear the patter of little feet?, is there a bun in the oven?,..can we make baby plans?,do people just have their radar focused in one direction, a linear one at that, marriage, then babies. granted i am getting on in years, so the luxury of time does not exist anymore.
hell i have just gotten used to the idea of sharing my bed,..finally after the last trip to OR Tambo, i felt the empty presence beside me, and realised that i have settled into marriage, and missed the sneezing, snoring bulk, the comforting body heat, next to me..now i have to contemplate the idea, of another tiny entity disrupting my idyllic life. but as sister in law pointed out, "your husband needs to be around for that"..i have a better idea, the next trip is in early September, so i have decided to pack my bags in anticipation..wait till GDH, gets wind of the plans i have afoot.
our next big step, will be moving into our newly purchased, old house, in the suburb of Norwood, another nightmare for GDW, one would imagine, at the prices we pay, the last owner could have at least, seen to the fact that the windows have handles...the joys of home ownership...and the irritation of unscrupulous real estate agents, and uncaring sellers, oh well, this is South Africa, and that should be no excuse for bad service, but i think we are inured to accepting the mediocre.
i am looking forward to the move, which will not happen for another three months, give or take the time it takes to transfer property in our fine country, so i will enjoy gatecrashing GDH'S business trip, extend it by 10 days and create a nice holiday around China, from Shanghai to Beijing...surprise, surprise.
much to my amazement GDH, is thoroughly enjoying his stay with the in laws, we have taken to nightly scrabble matches with little brother and his wife, and it surprises me, that we are so competitive, it's quite addictive,..just like marriage. my good friend Ashantha, has just accepted a proposal of marriage, so it seems that the institution is quite contagious,i can here it..love is in the air...wasn't that a Neil Diamond ditty, they love him at OR Tambo International, his crooning could be heard, as we dropped GDH at the airport for the umpteenth time, in our short but happy marriage. and yes, my sister in law..GDH'S sister that is,(the English language fails to differentiate which side of the family we are referring to)..reminded me that babies can only be made by having Sex,..for that GDH, needs to be in the country at the very least,..now that i have overcome my wedding phobia(not quite true)..i am dealing with,do we hear the patter of little feet?, is there a bun in the oven?,..can we make baby plans?,do people just have their radar focused in one direction, a linear one at that, marriage, then babies. granted i am getting on in years, so the luxury of time does not exist anymore.
hell i have just gotten used to the idea of sharing my bed,..finally after the last trip to OR Tambo, i felt the empty presence beside me, and realised that i have settled into marriage, and missed the sneezing, snoring bulk, the comforting body heat, next to me..now i have to contemplate the idea, of another tiny entity disrupting my idyllic life. but as sister in law pointed out, "your husband needs to be around for that"..i have a better idea, the next trip is in early September, so i have decided to pack my bags in anticipation..wait till GDH, gets wind of the plans i have afoot.
our next big step, will be moving into our newly purchased, old house, in the suburb of Norwood, another nightmare for GDW, one would imagine, at the prices we pay, the last owner could have at least, seen to the fact that the windows have handles...the joys of home ownership...and the irritation of unscrupulous real estate agents, and uncaring sellers, oh well, this is South Africa, and that should be no excuse for bad service, but i think we are inured to accepting the mediocre.
i am looking forward to the move, which will not happen for another three months, give or take the time it takes to transfer property in our fine country, so i will enjoy gatecrashing GDH'S business trip, extend it by 10 days and create a nice holiday around China, from Shanghai to Beijing...surprise, surprise.
Monday, March 07, 2011
a government of racists
It’s quite shocking that after getting rid of a government and system which prided itself on it’s racist, divisive principles we are back to square one with the likes of government spokesman Jimmy Manyi.
Who are all these creepy, stupid people who have just crawled out of the woodwork, and are now the rank and file of the ANC? Is it not enough that we suffer the likes of Julius Malema, now we have to listen to the rantings of the likes of Manyi and Paul Ngobeni? These are the voices of our new government, those that are in charge of making the decisions that will govern the future of ALL South Africans, the once respected ANC, has become no better than the regime we fought so hard to destroy.
Has the ANC, have moved so far away from the principles of non-sexism, non-racialism, and building a united democratic South Africa? What would our respected leaders; Nelson Mandela, Joe Slovo, Walter Sisulu, Doctor Dadoo, Chief Albert Lulthuli, to name but a few; think of this unacceptable behaviour? What happened to the belief in a country that supports the rights of all who live in it? South Africa has become a haven for quick enrichment and entitlement without due consideration for the people of this country.
We are a South Africa, bent on enriching cronies and fat cat politicians and we have moved so far away from the principles that toppled a despotic regime? We will someday, in the not so distant future, be looking down the barrel of a gun. The people of South Africa will not tolerate such obviously racist and divisive sentiment for much longer? The politicians are all jockeying to play down these rumblings as they need votes for the upcoming elections. The problem is that, we the voters are not stupid. The party should grow some balls, and rid itself of these selfish, greedy imbeciles before they take our promising future down the toilet with them.
instead of vying to spin doctor away these, noxious elements, get rid of them. At least Trevor Manual is still principled enough to openly respond to Manyi's racist comments. Our leaders will be be cringing in their graves at such obvious prejudice: "Indians bargaining their way to the top", Western Cape "coloureds" flooding the jobs market. These guys are all on the gravy train, and have the audacity to claim that they are speaking on behalf of the South African people. Well they are not speaking on my behalf.
Is this the face and a cover story we present to the world? Whatever happened to the principles of being fair and non-prejudiced to all who live in this country.
Nelson Mandela and the erstwhile leaders of our nation were fighting against domination of both black and white, in fact domination of any kind? Why then are the ANC and our Government so hell bent on supporting these offensive human beings. The aim should be the promotion and advancement of South Africa, not the promotion and advancement of a BUNCH OF NITWITS. Who only have the job, because they know somebody, who new somebody else. Both Jacob Zuma and the ministers under his wing, should be truly ashamed, and for once in their lives, live up to the principles that South Africans fought and died for. The Moral Compass, is totally lacking and must be recalibrated.
The fact is that we are lacking direction from any real leadership from these guys who are so hell bent on lining their pockets, that we are losing our principles, and the country is slipping into decay. This hardly makes a bleep on their radar What kind of a country, who's public face is so proudly racist, do we present to the world? And we are arrogant enough to want a permanent seat on the United Nations Security Council....if i was any self-respecting head of state, I would never be able to second any such request.
How is the present ANC government any better than the despots in Egypt, Libya or Zimbabwe? BEE has become the swear word to hide the radical chasm growing within the ANC. It is all about elections and personal enrichment and principles have been forsaken for a ride on the "GRAVY TRAIN". And it is only the country and its people that will suffer the consequences of racism and prejudice.
SHAME ON ALL OF YOU......if you want my vote, this is definitely not how you will get it.
Who are all these creepy, stupid people who have just crawled out of the woodwork, and are now the rank and file of the ANC? Is it not enough that we suffer the likes of Julius Malema, now we have to listen to the rantings of the likes of Manyi and Paul Ngobeni? These are the voices of our new government, those that are in charge of making the decisions that will govern the future of ALL South Africans, the once respected ANC, has become no better than the regime we fought so hard to destroy.
Has the ANC, have moved so far away from the principles of non-sexism, non-racialism, and building a united democratic South Africa? What would our respected leaders; Nelson Mandela, Joe Slovo, Walter Sisulu, Doctor Dadoo, Chief Albert Lulthuli, to name but a few; think of this unacceptable behaviour? What happened to the belief in a country that supports the rights of all who live in it? South Africa has become a haven for quick enrichment and entitlement without due consideration for the people of this country.
We are a South Africa, bent on enriching cronies and fat cat politicians and we have moved so far away from the principles that toppled a despotic regime? We will someday, in the not so distant future, be looking down the barrel of a gun. The people of South Africa will not tolerate such obviously racist and divisive sentiment for much longer? The politicians are all jockeying to play down these rumblings as they need votes for the upcoming elections. The problem is that, we the voters are not stupid. The party should grow some balls, and rid itself of these selfish, greedy imbeciles before they take our promising future down the toilet with them.
instead of vying to spin doctor away these, noxious elements, get rid of them. At least Trevor Manual is still principled enough to openly respond to Manyi's racist comments. Our leaders will be be cringing in their graves at such obvious prejudice: "Indians bargaining their way to the top", Western Cape "coloureds" flooding the jobs market. These guys are all on the gravy train, and have the audacity to claim that they are speaking on behalf of the South African people. Well they are not speaking on my behalf.
Is this the face and a cover story we present to the world? Whatever happened to the principles of being fair and non-prejudiced to all who live in this country.
Nelson Mandela and the erstwhile leaders of our nation were fighting against domination of both black and white, in fact domination of any kind? Why then are the ANC and our Government so hell bent on supporting these offensive human beings. The aim should be the promotion and advancement of South Africa, not the promotion and advancement of a BUNCH OF NITWITS. Who only have the job, because they know somebody, who new somebody else. Both Jacob Zuma and the ministers under his wing, should be truly ashamed, and for once in their lives, live up to the principles that South Africans fought and died for. The Moral Compass, is totally lacking and must be recalibrated.
The fact is that we are lacking direction from any real leadership from these guys who are so hell bent on lining their pockets, that we are losing our principles, and the country is slipping into decay. This hardly makes a bleep on their radar What kind of a country, who's public face is so proudly racist, do we present to the world? And we are arrogant enough to want a permanent seat on the United Nations Security Council....if i was any self-respecting head of state, I would never be able to second any such request.
How is the present ANC government any better than the despots in Egypt, Libya or Zimbabwe? BEE has become the swear word to hide the radical chasm growing within the ANC. It is all about elections and personal enrichment and principles have been forsaken for a ride on the "GRAVY TRAIN". And it is only the country and its people that will suffer the consequences of racism and prejudice.
SHAME ON ALL OF YOU......if you want my vote, this is definitely not how you will get it.
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
BOUAZIZ THE AWAKENING IN NORTH AFRICA
Tunisian sympathies for a lowly vegetable seller sent there erstwhile dictator scurrying for shelter in Riaad, strange how the worlds dictators in one form or another head to the most repressed capital in the world for succour, idi Armin did it, the Tunisian is hold up there as well,Mubarak he is probably going to pay the queen a visit, since his billions have been ferreted away in the united kingdom, for the day the Egyptians rise from their political coma,
and indeed they did the 27/01/2011, will be a day the Egyptians will remember for years to come, hopefully since they have risen from their politically apathetic state, they will have the confidence, to hold on and ensure that Mubarak becomes history, and moves to England where he will sip champagne, shop at Harrods, and make regular trips to the bank to check that his billions are secure.
the images of tahrir square broadcast by the likes of Al Jazeera, BBC, sky, and CNN, makes on realise, that it is not just all about cake, Marie Antoinette lost her head, Mubarak i am sure wants to keep his, the reality is, that when the masses reach saturation point, and poverty and hunger prevails, the head of a dictator is sure to roll, the stupidity of the human race is, that dictators never learn from the lessons history teaches, their greed and lust for power, makes them blind, deaf and dumb to the rumbles at grassroots levels, maybe if they came down from their lofty perches every now and then to smell the manure on the ground they would not cling to power so avariciously.
Hosni, get the message, your people want both you and Gamal out, so eat some humble pie, hand in your resignation, retire to Kensington, and entertain the queen to tea, the Egyptians will be happy, and perhaps finally, free and fare elections will see a new dispensation elected by the people, for the people, and Egypt can rise out of its coma, to be a respected country and a valuable part of the African continent once again.
we live in hope that the Turks, Algerians, Jordanians, Moroccans, are paying careful attention to the rumbles of hungry bellies, that the desperation of poverty and the absence of respect for human beings will eventually rise up to defeat the despot.
and indeed they did the 27/01/2011, will be a day the Egyptians will remember for years to come, hopefully since they have risen from their politically apathetic state, they will have the confidence, to hold on and ensure that Mubarak becomes history, and moves to England where he will sip champagne, shop at Harrods, and make regular trips to the bank to check that his billions are secure.
the images of tahrir square broadcast by the likes of Al Jazeera, BBC, sky, and CNN, makes on realise, that it is not just all about cake, Marie Antoinette lost her head, Mubarak i am sure wants to keep his, the reality is, that when the masses reach saturation point, and poverty and hunger prevails, the head of a dictator is sure to roll, the stupidity of the human race is, that dictators never learn from the lessons history teaches, their greed and lust for power, makes them blind, deaf and dumb to the rumbles at grassroots levels, maybe if they came down from their lofty perches every now and then to smell the manure on the ground they would not cling to power so avariciously.
Hosni, get the message, your people want both you and Gamal out, so eat some humble pie, hand in your resignation, retire to Kensington, and entertain the queen to tea, the Egyptians will be happy, and perhaps finally, free and fare elections will see a new dispensation elected by the people, for the people, and Egypt can rise out of its coma, to be a respected country and a valuable part of the African continent once again.
we live in hope that the Turks, Algerians, Jordanians, Moroccans, are paying careful attention to the rumbles of hungry bellies, that the desperation of poverty and the absence of respect for human beings will eventually rise up to defeat the despot.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
wedding bells and cockle shells
ITS ALL ABOUT THE SMILE....
THERE IS A RING..AND MOST DEFINITELY THE ABSENCE OF BLING...
BUT NO TRAVELLING PANTS...:) THE ENGAGEMENT.
October 2010...was when the wedding bells told for me, and my greatest stress was that the travelling wedding pants, having been banned from baby brothers wedding would definitely not see the light of day on this one.
shortly after little brother made his intentions known, my dad turned his beady eyes on the only single sibling left, and said, "my dear what are your plans?",.."you cannot be dating forever, not good for you or Albert. predictably i was off to dinner with boyfriend to discuss the matter, long term dating is never an option in the Indian family, being Muslim, makes it all the more trying, not to mention all the snoopy men at mosque, were trying to fish out the seriousness of our relationship.
so over serious dinner discussion, do not ask me where or when, i fail to remember such trivial things, we decided..(much to my surprise, marriage being definitely not on my radar)to become MR and MRS, no, not Smith,...i am months later still wondering what all the bruhaha is all about, the news of impending nuptials spread faster, then a brush fire in the Australian outback, i got calls from excited family and friends thanking God, calling on his greatness, for saving the last spinster in the family from the inglorious state of singledom, God had finally made me accept a marriage proposal and all was well with the world again.
i am now of the opinion, that being single was not considered "lekker", and it was possibly a punishment from God,...you think i might attain heaven now that i am a Mrs,..God i hope you are listening, if you are, could i win the lottery please? a million would do nicely thank you.
it came to pass, in a rather low key affair (by Indian standards)on the 6th of February 2010, i became an engaged woman,...we were truly moving into the rainbow nation, Albert is of Portuguese and Afrikaans decent, and i am a true blue Gujarati,..my ancestry could have some Arab or Chinese thrown in who knows,..
my mother in law, put a pretty gold chain around my neck, my fiance a pretty diamond ring on my finger, and without the long drawn out speeches, and prayers thanking the Gods, without ululating, or any of the grand fanfair that goes with the occasion, i had committed myself to....MARRIAGE!!!....oh dear.
understandably my mother was rather quiet, a little smile but no great enthusiasm, well, i had been with her for 41 long years, and now what the hell was i doing?, in that moment i was being dazzled by diamond rings..ok, ok..i am not that mercenary, and poor husband is yet to cough up the goodies, that comes with marrying into an Indian family,...what did you think we gave away our daughters cheaply,...oh dear me no.
The run up to the wedding was the right royal pain in the ass i thought it would be, there was no chance of missing out at the office to plan a wedding, so it all got done, in between moments, there is a reason, i don't like weddings, and my own was proving to be no different, the dress, the hair, the venue, the caterer, the list is endless, and oh the guest list, which lead to many an argument, i was pushing for 100 guests, my dad was "you cannot get away with under 300", 300, i don't know 300 people, and really all i was interested in was the party, we settled on the 2nd of October 2010, which coincidentally, ok i lie, by no mere coincidence is also the 45th wedding anniversary of my parents, who i am sure after many an argument, all wedding related, could not wait for the 2nd to come fast enough. getting rid of me was proving to be acceptable, and at some point, they were willing to do this for free and for gratis.
as luck would have it, i could not have been bothered with a dress, thanks to the generosity of Aadil, who called the dress guy, Michael and finally pushed me into going to check him out, we were on the road to dress heaven...my only brief, i do not want to look like a meringue. i also did not relish the thought of a gazillion dress fittings, which are aggravating and the damned dress always looks crap, since i was lazy, i also got some fabric, prior to seeing Michael, and went off to another clients recommendation, just 1km up the road, the long and the short of it was that i ended up with two wedding dresses, not having the heart to tell Chantal..that i had another dress, when i got her bill, i realised my inability to say no, had just cost me a small fortune, no matter i now have another dress, that i will never wear again, but hey it rocked on the night.
i was still at this point not running a fever or jumping with excitement at the thought of getting married, my brain was still trying to comprehend what all the fuss was about, and the constant are you excited? question was starting to drive me insane, excited about what, i had met someone, and we had decided to make a life together, was i nervous? no, was i excited? no, this all seriously felt like another day at the office, with more work thrown in, to fill my already full working day.
perhaps it was my lack of stress, or excitement, perhaps i was to old to feel the jitter bug, perhaps i was being to pragmatic, hell, there were a multitude of perhapes, i could have dreamed up, three weeks before my party (because weddings are just to fake). the wedding planner (ya right)..i had done all the planning, just needed the guy to provide tablecloths and food, turned out to be the biggest "wanker" (literally) of all time, he wanted to bill me for two weddings, give me a break, the venue was mine until midnight, our plan was to utilise it for that long, as we were going to party,and enjoy 45 years of marital bliss, as well.
but Muslim weddings don't have music and dancing and Indians eat, take the gift and fuck off, before the bride even leaves the venue, so really his staff only worked till 5. this wedding was a Saturday afternoon luncheon, that would go into dancing in the evening,two bills? , give me a kit kat, i was about to swat him from here back to the teeny tiny village in Gujarat he hailed from.furthermore i had the audacity to have an opinion or idea on what i wanted the venue to look like, to cut a long story short, i told him to shove his drapes, masquerading as tablecloths where the sun does not shine, and took my pissed off ass back to the office.
suffice to say the wanderers club, have not yet returned my money, and the wanker Aadil, "i have no qualifications as a wedding planner" and certainly no taste; is still contracted to the club as their halaal caterer.
thanks to my mum and a great tip, we found an alternate venue, with a great chef, and staff that were efficient and happy to do the job, there were no need for vapours and stress hives, we moved on, to celebrate the day with much laughter and happiness, the DJ played until the bewitching hour, we ate drank, and made merry and celebrated the 45th wedding anniversary of my parents surrounded by new family, great friends and the best tea totalling party anyone ever had the misfortune to attend got us off to the start of a happy married life together. honestly weddings aren't so bad after all, when your friends really want to be there, and your family love a party, then it is the happiest most fun filled day a couple will enjoy, the stuff happy memories are made of
since then, all i ever get asked, "so how is married life?'...are you happy?"..hell would i have gotten married if i was not happy?, would i remain married if i was not happy?, how is married life really?....its fun people, it's like a comfortable old shoe, you can never give away, its dishes, and laundry, its bad movies and a barrel of laughs, it's good morning breath, and hot showers, its just every day life, with a person, who doesn't mind seeing your wake up hair, and unmade up face. who looks at your miserable face in the morning and says "good morning my gorgeous wife"..it's knowing that and loving that..and enjoying that forever feeling.
its definitelly not wedding bells and cockle shells....
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
compromise the four letter word.
i just had a very disturbing email from a good friend, 2010 has proved to be a truly bad year for her,and for a couple of other's to. for me of course it brought GDH, into my life, and reading my friends disturbing email, set me off thinking about compromise, is this really a four letter word, are we to demanding of the people in our lives, or in fact to demanding on our selves.
are the things we believe we must have or want in our lives, creating pressure's, large enough,that ending your life seems the only answer. perhaps marriage is the four letter word, why do we embark on this journey, if we are unwilling or unable to adjust ourselves to the changes that inevitably follows the institution of marriage.
modern man i believe is greedy, and needful and lustful of an outwardly material lifestyle that essentially is not very realistic, we envy the Hollywood lifestyles of the rich and famous, as we avariciously lap up the ideal, glued to satellite television and hello magazine. we see our co-workers spending fortunes on the latest trendy eateries, on designer clothing, electronic gadgets and the like, and we crave that lifestyle, the ordinary mundane existence of children, husbands and being the stay at home mom, becomes a stress, we need to work, to earn, to afford the lifestyle, and the kids become a bore, the husband is a bore and definitely a nurturing home, is the biggest bore.
Angelina Jolie, has Brad pit, a brood of kids and a designer lifestyle,...and she is definitely not bored, she did not have to compromise, on eating out, great parties, the red carpet, but then she is not me, middle class Jane, with a husband, three kids, no job, essentially no life, and by sitting at home, with no escape from kids, not enough cash for outside entertainment, we fight, we bottle our anxieties, to the point of feeling useless, unloved, unwanted.we are resentful of our husbands because, he goes to work, is stimulated, comes home full of the days stresses, when we have been locked away at home, bored,bored,bored.
this is not about compromise, life becomes an unfair resented circumstance, there is, i want to shout a huge difference between reality, and the reality of the rich and famous, we cannot all be Angelina or Brad or even the neighbour next door, we each have our own set of circumstances from which to live, and learn to appreciate, yet being the avaricious, animal, we are never satisfied, and the grass always looks greener on the other side.
we are essentially the sole creators of the circumstances we live in, our choice to be married was not forced on us, our choice to have children, was not a mishap, or an unguarded moment, so adjusting from being single, was not an unexpected circumstance,now to be resented, we made a choice, and the choice comes with its own unique circumstances, should we not learn to embrace this, learn to live for ourselves, not to show the world our achievements, but to appreciate the reality of our circumstances for ourselves, that is not a compromise, not a four letter word, it is an acceptance of choices, perhaps then the anti-depressants, trips to the shrink or drowning in the bath tub, might not seem the solution.
are the things we believe we must have or want in our lives, creating pressure's, large enough,that ending your life seems the only answer. perhaps marriage is the four letter word, why do we embark on this journey, if we are unwilling or unable to adjust ourselves to the changes that inevitably follows the institution of marriage.
modern man i believe is greedy, and needful and lustful of an outwardly material lifestyle that essentially is not very realistic, we envy the Hollywood lifestyles of the rich and famous, as we avariciously lap up the ideal, glued to satellite television and hello magazine. we see our co-workers spending fortunes on the latest trendy eateries, on designer clothing, electronic gadgets and the like, and we crave that lifestyle, the ordinary mundane existence of children, husbands and being the stay at home mom, becomes a stress, we need to work, to earn, to afford the lifestyle, and the kids become a bore, the husband is a bore and definitely a nurturing home, is the biggest bore.
Angelina Jolie, has Brad pit, a brood of kids and a designer lifestyle,...and she is definitely not bored, she did not have to compromise, on eating out, great parties, the red carpet, but then she is not me, middle class Jane, with a husband, three kids, no job, essentially no life, and by sitting at home, with no escape from kids, not enough cash for outside entertainment, we fight, we bottle our anxieties, to the point of feeling useless, unloved, unwanted.we are resentful of our husbands because, he goes to work, is stimulated, comes home full of the days stresses, when we have been locked away at home, bored,bored,bored.
this is not about compromise, life becomes an unfair resented circumstance, there is, i want to shout a huge difference between reality, and the reality of the rich and famous, we cannot all be Angelina or Brad or even the neighbour next door, we each have our own set of circumstances from which to live, and learn to appreciate, yet being the avaricious, animal, we are never satisfied, and the grass always looks greener on the other side.
we are essentially the sole creators of the circumstances we live in, our choice to be married was not forced on us, our choice to have children, was not a mishap, or an unguarded moment, so adjusting from being single, was not an unexpected circumstance,now to be resented, we made a choice, and the choice comes with its own unique circumstances, should we not learn to embrace this, learn to live for ourselves, not to show the world our achievements, but to appreciate the reality of our circumstances for ourselves, that is not a compromise, not a four letter word, it is an acceptance of choices, perhaps then the anti-depressants, trips to the shrink or drowning in the bath tub, might not seem the solution.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
is matric all its cracked up to be
i cannot understand why our country fails to steer school leavers into learning a trade. why do institutions like the university of Johannesburg, continue to entertain these school leavers, who don't even have university exemptions.yes you want more black students passing through the system, however the education system, has been adjusted, (and not with great success i might add,)..so putting ill qualified kids into university does this country a greater disservice in my opinion of course.
the way i understand things:, tertiary education is a privilege not a right. To qualify for university entrance, one has to be a scholar of excellence, be able to afford tuition, or qualify for a scholarship or bursary, and if one did not qualify, then at least hold down a job, that helps you pay your way through university.why this feeling of entitlement, and demand for things, we are not willing to work our asses off, to have, all this attitude breeds is my contempt (understandably..no one gives a damn about that), however where do we get off expecting the bells and whistles without having to work to get it.
university entrance has become an unruly scrum, to gain admittance. university is a right not a privilege, and someone else has to foot the bill. the caliber of student is definitely not worth that sacrifice, and more importantly the attitude of these supposed students leaves much to be desired. they are an unruly, disrespectful mob, looking for the easy way out, quality education, dedication to education, hard work and enterprise are not at the top of the list. if 33 and a 1/3% is the pass rate, it is certainly obvious why we have an attitude failure. under these circumstances, what caliber of academics are we churning out, our research capabilities and input in the sciences across the spectrum, fails to excite or ignite any real interest.
while i am all for levelling the education playing fields and providing opportunities, to those who never had any, does that mean, that regardless of capacity, universities, should allow people in, i believe, that by doing this we are reducing the class and caliber of our academics into mediocrity, is that how we perceive the future of our country? mediocre.
surely we should be bolstering, technical colleges and the like, so we can increase people in the skilled trades , why has plumbing, or being an electrician or mechanic become taboo, these are all highly skilled professions, which in some cases are more financially lucrative, then being a lawyer as an example, yet most matriculants if asked want to go to law school. hell who needs another lawyer.
but a trades person with ethics and pride in his or her work, would certainly be most welcome, and definitely deserving of our utmost respect,...lets see what the class of 2010 results in...a capital F for failure, or perhaps in and amongst the miscreants, there will be a huge A for achievement and dedication..lets see
the way i understand things:, tertiary education is a privilege not a right. To qualify for university entrance, one has to be a scholar of excellence, be able to afford tuition, or qualify for a scholarship or bursary, and if one did not qualify, then at least hold down a job, that helps you pay your way through university.why this feeling of entitlement, and demand for things, we are not willing to work our asses off, to have, all this attitude breeds is my contempt (understandably..no one gives a damn about that), however where do we get off expecting the bells and whistles without having to work to get it.
university entrance has become an unruly scrum, to gain admittance. university is a right not a privilege, and someone else has to foot the bill. the caliber of student is definitely not worth that sacrifice, and more importantly the attitude of these supposed students leaves much to be desired. they are an unruly, disrespectful mob, looking for the easy way out, quality education, dedication to education, hard work and enterprise are not at the top of the list. if 33 and a 1/3% is the pass rate, it is certainly obvious why we have an attitude failure. under these circumstances, what caliber of academics are we churning out, our research capabilities and input in the sciences across the spectrum, fails to excite or ignite any real interest.
while i am all for levelling the education playing fields and providing opportunities, to those who never had any, does that mean, that regardless of capacity, universities, should allow people in, i believe, that by doing this we are reducing the class and caliber of our academics into mediocrity, is that how we perceive the future of our country? mediocre.
surely we should be bolstering, technical colleges and the like, so we can increase people in the skilled trades , why has plumbing, or being an electrician or mechanic become taboo, these are all highly skilled professions, which in some cases are more financially lucrative, then being a lawyer as an example, yet most matriculants if asked want to go to law school. hell who needs another lawyer.
but a trades person with ethics and pride in his or her work, would certainly be most welcome, and definitely deserving of our utmost respect,...lets see what the class of 2010 results in...a capital F for failure, or perhaps in and amongst the miscreants, there will be a huge A for achievement and dedication..lets see
Tuesday, January 04, 2011
resolutions
GDW..AND GDH...OUR FIRST EID AS A MARRIED COUPLE..
this blog, is very much a private diary, here i am on the fourth day of the first month in the year 2011, with infrequent postings, and no book deal, wherever did i go wrong.
no matter GDH (short for gorgeous darling husband), is reading a book,/published blog, and nagging me to start blogging again, dear please understand, i am no Shakespeare, and this blog has no following, never the less, here is a resolution, and i never make those, i will blog more regularly, i will blog more regularly, i will blog more regularly..help, if i continue in this vein, my singular typing finger is going to be ground to a short nubby stump.
to the one reader, who has by default stumbled upon these ramblings, yes i did mention GDH...who for the purpose of this blog, will remain forever GDH, until such time as i have outgrown the honeymoon phase, yes, i did it, i got married, and the process and time it took to get there, will be continued at some later date....and, no, my travelling wedding pants did not make the cut once again.
if any of you believe, that preparing my own wedding, was for me more pleasant then attending a wedding, get over yourselves, it definitely ranked amongst the, i know why people should never marry, or just elope, and get it the hell over with,.. but that's me,... you will all know,by now, that, i believe, weddings to be a waste of time, energy,effort, and not to mention a waste of money....but the honeymoon, now that was worth the aggravation.
any way i am now to be known as GDW (gorgeous darling wife)...have a doting husband..whom, my father, cannot help but constantly tease,..."darling are you having tea with me?"...gorgeous, sweety,...can i help, etc,etc...dad thinks, he should have been A more doting Husband then my mum would never have need to call him a "galchodo manus"...(gujarati, that i cannot spell), of course, GDW, grins and bears it, as he is the new kid on the block, the guji, flies over his head, and unfortunately, he is the only white, in our brown universe, so his the "DORO"...white boy, and ripe for the picking.
well hey,since i succumbed to the ball and chain, i was not going to tow the line, now was i?...and quite frankly, which of my "own kind" (tongue in cheek ne') was going to be able to cope with me...unfortunately poor GDH...had his rose tinted glasses on,...and exactly 3 months and 2 days later, he is still wearing them, we got over the heartburn, from to much curry,...now we have to deal with the heartburn, that is an Indian family, and Indian culture, that have relaxed into themselves, and found a place to put the new recruit....poor GDH...how will he cope?
in my universe, as you can see, there are no resolutions...i dont do gym, or diets, so thats, that...but i will blog...slightly more than twice a year, perhaps when we have our "goa-nese" kids..(baby brother Arshad..likes to refer to any future rug rats as such)..since GDH..Is of portuguese descent...there might be much to talk about, for now this mish mashing of our differing cultural heritage, will, i am sure provide some entertainment, atleast for me.
more importantly, what overides all of the above, is the fact that we are South African first, and we will navigate our lives, as such. GDH..is developing a taste for curry in more ways then one, GDW..is realising that marriage is not so bad after all.
Monday, July 26, 2010
even the wedding is history
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wow, i am obviously overly busy,(or so i would like to believe ) my last post was in February when baby brother got engaged, so much has happened since.
Arshad is now married two months and two days to be exact. the newly weds are not so new anymore, and seem to be enjoying the first flush of the marriage cycle.
i almost had nothing to wear, yes the travelling pants, and a myriad of accompanying jackets,tops,and sweaters, were banned from this wedding. the sister of the groom, had to look at least a teensy bit blinged out. so after two months of ferrying the mother of the groom, and my beloved mum, to the dress guy, for the umpteenth time, i succumbed, purchased some beautiful velvet, and a rather funky looking, almost under wear type fabric, and i was giving the getting a dress made thing a shot.
so,.. he said i had saddle bags, I'm a bit overweight, he suggested a corset, at which point, i could have burst a blood vessel,..under no circumstances, was i going to subject myself, to feeling like a trussed up chicken,even for baby brothers wedding. i should have known, that this was going to go south.
on the day of the big reveal, just two weeks before the wedding, the MAN delivers my eagerly awaited dresses, yes plural, this was after all an Indian wedding, wedding on Saturday, walimah on Sunday....and no wedding pants, i was doomed and i new it.
the dresses (plural) were about the most hideous excuse for a garment, i had ever encounted, and i did not want to have to say, i told me so, a psychotic amount of money later, i was as belligerent as a two year old being denied, sweets, in a candy store, there, was not a chance in hell, that these garments would ever see the light of day...so i made a big shout out to friends on facebook, got some great responses, and took myself off to Hyde park shopping centre. all i can say is that HIP HOP rocks, ( thanks Leonie )first dress i tried on, was a shoe in, the deal was done, i was dressed, no stress, no endless fittings, no sales lady commenting on my saddle bags, 42 year old tummy, or that little bit of extra weight, that i regularly bemoan, but do nothing about.
the dress mind you, was rejected by Natasha my sister in law, who is tall, puts twiggy to shame, and could wear anything, so thanks sis..and all because she cant stand velvet..the next day, the little bolero, that came with the dress, teamed with another off the peg number from a chain store, ET voila!!..dressed for Arshads walimah, recycled clothing no less,...shhhh!!, don't let the word get out, or my upmarket neighbours, and the debutantes of this neighbourhood, will have another reason, to tilt the blue noses away from me, or is that because of the rather cold winter we are having.
the wedding itself, was a wedding..what can i say, i rather think, that my own, would also be just another, excuse for an elaborate lunch, where people will fall all over themselves to be the best dressed turkey at the ball. Arshad wanted to kill the photographer, the couple spent their entire wedding, smiling for the camera, should they not have been celebrating with guests, eating, the great food, that was on offer, instead, they smiled, and spent all night in the glare of the photographers spotlight, take it from me, get your pictures done before the reception, so you can at least enjoy some of your wedding.
ahhh!!! lest i forget, weddings have nothing to do with bride and groom, but more to do with proud parents, and overly dressed turkeys, all who come to see and be seen, and then, dissect your function, over tea, with the ladies the very next day, all the while, the newly weds, spent happy oblivious moments, looking into each others eyes, and the hapless, sister of the groom, takes matters into her own hands, to get them out of the photographers clutches, and the insane family, queueing for their picture with bride and groom,...so that the overly tired couple can be whisked off to their hotel, for some alone time, and much needed sleep.
yes sleep, after two weeks of indian wedding, there is nothing the love struck couple will ever do but try to sleep,...since the next morning, the three ringed circus begins a new. so a solid nights rest, is left for the honeymoon, as well as exploring, the best reason, for really getting married right?....its all legal.
the two weeks of wedding activity, went off rather well, and the newly weds jetted off to Mauritius, and the way Arshad describes it, a trip to Goa, might be more exciting.despite our choice of walimah venue, the fundos, also pitched, eek, going through that casino, rubbed a few noses out of joint, but the thought of succulent prawns, and mango desert must have clinched the deal.
my love hate relationship with weddings continues, there is no end in sight, perhaps when i am carried off to my final resting place, i will find some peace with it all.
bring it on, to add to my travelling wedding pants, we now have a midnight blue gown...lets hope that middle age spread can be contained, so the dress sees, the light once more.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
ENGAGEMENTS
the cute little guy is Isa
the happy couple
FAEEZA, ARSHAD, AND THEIR MOMS
Faeeza's master piece, Arshad had better watch his waist line..:)
the spread at the proposal, Arshad looks on as mother's-in-law get chatting
so little brother got engaged..wedding is set for the 22ND of may 2010.
now i ask you why me, i have reached that middle of life, comfort where my favourite clothes are comfy baggy track pants...ya, ya, i know that is not good for the rear end or the hips, but I'm here, and baby brother is getting married.
to all of you who do or have never read my ramblings, i am not a fan of the "WEDDING"..the idea is off putting, and nothing about getting dressed up, rings true. wedding guests, are caricatures of their true selves, and its much like bad theatre, with some food thrown in for minor effect.
then of course comes the bitching and back stabbing after, the bride looked tired, the food was cheap, the mother in law had a bad hair day, the list is endless, then there are the "aunties" who are constantly trying to hook you up, with the "eligible" single, one eyed, mentally deficient single nephew....having said all this, my baby, and my nephews Baba, is tying the knot. my dilemma? what the hell do i wear?, since i lazed into the track pants, and happily grew into its expanding
size i am now really put out.
have only myself to blame, the thought of having to put on lipstick, or any form of makeup, is something else that erks me, but what is a girl going to do. there are just those occasions where, being beautiful and on show is called for. i hope my baby knows what a great "sacrifice" this is, he won't accept a card board cut out, so i will be there, dressed up, and very happy.
don't get me wrong, i am seriously happy, and i pray that Arshad's and Faeeza's lives are blessed with happiness, acceptance, love, and prosperity for all the days of their lives, of course it would be great if they produced more nieces and nephews for me to love, the first two, have taken to running away when they see my handy cam, i need new suckers!..i will be posting the pics of the happy tidings, so my camera shy younger brother better puck up, grin and bear it, since he is the one that chose to say i do.
we had the family over on Saturday, to celebrate their happy day, it was so good to relax and catch up. these guys are always waiting for some news from my father's household, so we will finally give them all a reason to get dressed up, i would like some gifts as well please, is anybody reading this..:)
my travelling wedding pants are a tad tight, and will not do for the sister of the groom. i am so bad at anything eastern, sari's, gaghra's etc, and western clothes have been designed for twiggy's even skinnier sister. so here i am, new short hair, not advisable with eastern dress, and my ever expanding rear, trying to forget that Baba is getting married.
budget speeches and presidents wives
February 2010 came around, President Jacob Zuma, and his many wives attended the opening of parliament on the 11Th of February. He made the worst speech of any President in the world ever, it said nothing and meant even less, if the growing girth of Presidential wives and members of parliament is anything to go by, one can now fully understand where the trillion Rand budget is heading.
into the bellies of our finance minister, and parliamentarians, not to mention their overfed wives and husbands.the media is awash, with scandals on corruption, and misuse of state funds, our president visits Davos, and all they can ask him, is about his wives, mistresses, and numerous children, twenty at the last count,i think, ofcourse if he spent time in the the Soviet union or Tanzania or Zimbabwe, i am sure there would be a couple of cone heads resident there, he has become the quintessential cartoon character, and it's all culture. the man has a remote controlled trouser zipper, and only he cannot see that, it is a national embarrassment, between his "cultural" romps,and cordon bleu meals does he actually have time to govern a country, judging by his weak speech at the opening of parliament, i think not.
not to mention, that his speech writers can't have gotten past standard two, and he obviously did not take time out of his busy social schedule to actually read it.
if indeed he wrote that clap trap, then our future is not very promising.
how about budgets, ag shame parliamentarians will have to move from a seven series BMW to perhaps a five, they might get 1% less pay rise, shock horror, they might have to pay their own DSTV subscriptions, my heart actually bleeds, oh how about performance based pay, ooof!!, does that mean ministers might not get paid at all?
how could i be so stupid, it just means they will get bonus pay, the idea is to have the job, and not work, ...silly me, work towards adding some more girth, now that takes some doing. in the mean while, unrest will grow, pot holes will become craters, i forget, i have to tell the neighbours to close their swimming pools, because they are the root course of the craters in our roads. since we are paying more for fuel after the budget, and increased licensing fees, and road tolls, do you think the company digging up central and west streets in houghton, for the last year will ever come back to finish the job?
silly me they got paid...why should they care, it's the damned swimming pools, the rich guys insist on installing, just tax them some more, it is sure to mean, that we could build swimming pools in poorer places, or do they need, housing, medical,education?
viva democracy!!!!
into the bellies of our finance minister, and parliamentarians, not to mention their overfed wives and husbands.the media is awash, with scandals on corruption, and misuse of state funds, our president visits Davos, and all they can ask him, is about his wives, mistresses, and numerous children, twenty at the last count,i think, ofcourse if he spent time in the the Soviet union or Tanzania or Zimbabwe, i am sure there would be a couple of cone heads resident there, he has become the quintessential cartoon character, and it's all culture. the man has a remote controlled trouser zipper, and only he cannot see that, it is a national embarrassment, between his "cultural" romps,and cordon bleu meals does he actually have time to govern a country, judging by his weak speech at the opening of parliament, i think not.
not to mention, that his speech writers can't have gotten past standard two, and he obviously did not take time out of his busy social schedule to actually read it.
if indeed he wrote that clap trap, then our future is not very promising.
how about budgets, ag shame parliamentarians will have to move from a seven series BMW to perhaps a five, they might get 1% less pay rise, shock horror, they might have to pay their own DSTV subscriptions, my heart actually bleeds, oh how about performance based pay, ooof!!, does that mean ministers might not get paid at all?
how could i be so stupid, it just means they will get bonus pay, the idea is to have the job, and not work, ...silly me, work towards adding some more girth, now that takes some doing. in the mean while, unrest will grow, pot holes will become craters, i forget, i have to tell the neighbours to close their swimming pools, because they are the root course of the craters in our roads. since we are paying more for fuel after the budget, and increased licensing fees, and road tolls, do you think the company digging up central and west streets in houghton, for the last year will ever come back to finish the job?
silly me they got paid...why should they care, it's the damned swimming pools, the rich guys insist on installing, just tax them some more, it is sure to mean, that we could build swimming pools in poorer places, or do they need, housing, medical,education?
viva democracy!!!!
Thursday, January 14, 2010
summer holiday 2010
by the time 2009 drew to a close, a few days out of johannesburg was all the blessing i needed. this year we decided to utilise our time share at sun city, the pilansberg mountains, sounds of bird call, balmy weather, was just the panacea needed to energise and rejuvenate a tired me.
prior to that a day at mangwanani and some bonding time with my mum down at umdloti was heaven, despite rainy days and crowded beaches.
i have posted a link on this blog, for all you adventurous souls who have the desire to visit this beautiful land. just be warned the baboons and monkeys will mug you, and they are the stealthy silent type, keep your bananas under lock and key.
the kids also enjoyed some holiday fun, and as always foi, was happy to be woken at 6am, not really,.. but who can ignore a toothy smile, and drooly wet kisses, certainly not i.
it was a relaxing start to a year that holds much promise, there will be wedding bells, and lots of social activity for the pahad family this year. for one who hates or should i rather say dislikes the fanfare of atending such functions, what does one do, if you are the one taking the mad plunge, with little brother close on your heels. 2010 promises to be a rather interesting year.
what with the soccer world cup being hosted in South Africa, our dismal performance at cricket, Castor Semenya, running again, male/female the debate rages on. then there is Eskom, and its 35% increase for three years, ..this is undoubtedly going to be a year of milestones,hail stones,gall stones,kidney stones...the stones are on the move, and i hope that i will be here to record it all.
my hurdle will always be a mother , who's kids have not met her expectations of spousal relations, she grits her teeth, and does not bare it, has the fortitude to live with it. i have come to the conclusion rather late in life, that one will never please one's parents and certainly not one's mother, therefore prosper or fail we inevitably chart our own course in life, make the same mistakes or not. but they are ours to bare and live with.
i look forward to the world uncovered in 2010, with interest i watch to see if South Africa rises to her challenges, or continues down the road to bananaville, interesting times ahead
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
the rug rats are growing up
our little rug rats are growing up. Azad is always intent on hugging and kissing his sister, who has learnt, to cry foul constantly. he just doesn't understand that body tackling her, is not her idea of fun. Foi (that's me) doesn't have a problem rolling around on my rear, while being attacked by the rats.
Iman, has learnt to throw tantrums, is attached to mummy and daddy, can sleep only in her own space. she is the spitting image of my late paternal grandmother, but it seems her personality, is very different. she sure knows how to put on the snot and trane. she has just started walking, looks like a wobbly old lady from the back, but ever so cute. don't think she will ever holiday with dadi and foi, without the parents in tow. oh but the girl takes after foi, in one respect, she does justice to the meals put in front of her, now that is where Azad misses out, he has an aversion to food, unless it is a sweet, and he can have many.
that gorgeous precocious little one, has ,yes, you've guessed it found language, and happily chirps away about everything. currently we are into all kinds of construction vehicles, diggers, loaders, trucks, trucks, trucks. the favourite litany being, foi i need this, buy it for me now, this after perusing the brochures that accompany his latest purchases.
how it happened, that Azad is a boys boy, and iman a girly, girl, i cannot fathom, she loves kissing her dolls, hugging teddies, and is just heartbreakingly affectionate, he has to be bribed into hugs and kisses. Are we genetically programmed at birth, or perhaps its because he never gives little sister the time of day with the cars and trucks.
Azad is now 30 months, and Iman 18 months, they are a joy and pleasure to have around, what is even better, they can be returned to sender, when foi lies exhausted on the lawn, finished after a hard days play. rug rats we love you. the pictures were all taken on the day of Eid ul Adha 2009/11/17. i have as yet not lost my trigger happy camera finger...:)
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
what do i say?
thanks to rachelle potgieter for the pictures
Imraan Saloojee 10 November at 17:38
Hi Rouhana. I love you FB updates. sometimes funny, sometimes angry but always good.
On another matter, I am trying to get views from a few people whose opinion I trust. Being out of the country for some time, my constant news source for home has been the Internet. Reading the news bulletins for South Africa is really depressing! We seem to be lurching from one crisis to another. The rhetoric on all sides is becoming sharper and there is a real lack of respect. It seems that collectively we are as polarised as the bad apartheid days. What is going on?
i read this message sent to my inbox, by a school mate, and i can claim a good friend, and in that moment my mind hit a blank. what would i say in response.
i love this country of ours warts and all, but what do i say, our political and social landscape is just that depressing. i have blogged ad nausea, about corruption, general lack of accountability, lack of respect etc.
Imraan the sad truth is, i believe we have a people that have no understanding or comprehension of what democracy can mean to us as a nation.
sadly the liberation movement that brought us great joy, in breaking the shackles of apartheid, have failed to translate this into good governance.
our fear of falling into the racially divisive trap has meant that every failure, in terms of service delivery, infrastructures,etc. is never adequately dealt with, because it deteriorates into "you are saying this because we are black" litany.
spear headed by the likes of julius malema and others of the same ilk. when one cannot take responsibility for ones failures it is easier to blame race.
what we need is to believe in ourselves,the idea of entitlement has resulted in gross mismanagement, racial incitement, and a loss of patriotic fervour.
the struggle for equality was to give every South African a chance under our African sun, it did not discriminate when it came to race, since we have addressed these indiscretions it hasn't resulted in those in positions of power whether in government or within business putting the country and its people first, it has resulted in a demand for more material wealth and possessions, and once again a small majority have risen to financial highs while ordinary South Africans pay the bills. and watch the noose tighten around our necks.
what we need to get beyond is the issue of colour, to call a spade a spade, so if you are not performing, you should be fired, not kept in employment, ad infinitum.
the result is a general feeling of discontentment amongst South Africans who see their efforts being squandered, when this discontent is voiced, then you are automatically accused of racism.
the way i see it, it is about taking ownership of our mistakes as well as our failures, and until employment is not seen as an endless cash cow, but rather a privilege, that allows us to be a productive, developing nation, proud of our history and our achievements. we will remain a nation of whiners who's demands out way our pride and our morality.
what it is, is plain selfishness, an inability to love and put our country first on the part of government, big business corporations.
and when Joe public absorbs this, he to becomes selfish and abusive of his surroundings, his country, his people. why should we say no to crime, if government is crime riddled, and so the issues continue unabated an unresolved.
there seems an inability on any ones part to be honest and up front about these shortcomings. alas i have rambled on imraan, but i know without a doubt that this the land of my birth, is not doomed to failure. i believe there are more South Africans out there with a vision, to be a non racist,non sexist,united people. and until we get over our embarrassment regarding the race question, until we can say hey, you have failed to do what you have been mandated to, and we are going to utilise someone more competent, without playing the race card, it will be a long hard journey, but i believe we can get there.
lets just hope julius malema does not become a South African president, for then i know not what the future will hold. there is a lot of dead wood out there, the favours for comrades, friends, have all been attended to, now i think is the time to be accountable. i believe that people like you and i could make a difference, and the future lies in the hands of children, who are brought up with the right degree of respect, morality and pride in there nationality. what we need is to put the greater good ahead of the good for myself.
i attended the remembrance day parade on Sunday, and watched the young and old men and women of the SANDF, proudly march past city hall, i felt a sense of pride and belonging, this army was used to suppress , now it holds its head high in defense of all South Africans, these men and women, had pride and a loyalty to this country, a remembrance of our failings, and an acceptance of the best we can be, united and strong. i believe this is the South Africa we should be building. and i do believe given the right governance it can be achieved.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
from the free to the dom
in all this time, one would imagine there would be something new to talk about.
things in South Africa seem to remain the same for a huge period of time.
lets see:
1. julius malema, has grown even dumber than before,mmmm, thats a change. his bigotry is so asinine and i thought we had outgrown that symptom.
then perhaps not, i have not been referred to as a "darkie"/"koelie", in years but there you have it, the slanderous label headed my way out of the mouth of dare i say it a jealous female. so when you have nothing to say, or are just plain dumb, as is Malema, you should resort to racial slurs. it might make you feel better.
2. then there is President Jacob Zuma, who is visiting, rustenburg, and other unrest municipalities, where people are rioting, because of lack of service delivery, more like they don't have their finger in the pie, and now want some. the Pres however, has is task team of useless ministers, i will call them the "talk shop", appearances, make them seem more hands on, and effectually they will accomplish nothing.
3. recession is a new word for spending more tax payers money, it hasn't stopped all the freebies for ministers, free luxury cars, free flowers, free domestic service, free first class travel, free satellite tv, free, free, freedom, just meant free to be having my luxury cake and eating eat, and Marie Antoinette was going to feed the peasants cake,...she would be rolling in her grave now.
4.Electricity, now that is not free, by the year 2010, the average 3 bedroom house, will have a 3000.00 rand a month electricity bill. will the increase involve the mines, big business etc, who enjoy rebated electricity, obviously not. so here we are give or take 5 million tax payers, being further taxed,...do we mind paying the bills so that the less fortunate of this country, would have access to services, education, housing, we sure as hell don't. but, ...how much can you milk this cow, till she drops dead, while all the time her precious milk is squandered on maintaining the elitist life style of government, municipal,BEE fat cats, who higher yachts, have tv in their cars, drink moet, eat caviar, and the masses still languish in squalor.
5. then theres the sorry excuse of an education system, first year varsity students, cannot read or write in English. and now we should blame poverty, and lack of language usage, surely when you enter grade one, you should be taught in English, but it was that genius Kader Asmal, who made it impossible to fail a student, if they failed a written exam, they should get an oral, if they passed or failed that, they still got bummed up the ranks, are you surprised then, that varsity students, can't read,write,or do simple arithmetic, poverty is just the excuse to cover up, ministerial failure, outcomes based education my ass. you are breeding a nation of bigoted idiots, and passing the buck to poverty shame on us.
6. lets not forget Selebi, our embattled police commissioner, who will get off with no more than a wrap on the knuckles, the singing canary, Agliotti, is possibly going to come off the worse for wear, Selebi of course must still be on the government payroll. so what real effect will changing the ranking of police people, make to that corrupt institution,.. obviously nothing. And our army, lets not discuss those hooligans, if disciplined armies reflect the state of a nation, what do our hoodlums say about the state of our nation. surely by the time you are over thirty, you should have moved up the ranks or out of the army. thank God these guys are not having to defend us against attack, oh shit what am i thinking, we are under attack, attack from bigotry, greed,stupidity, arrogance, shall i go on.
7. where are the patriots, where are the good intentions, hard work, integrity, that we were building our new free nation on, well free exists, just in terms of material upliftment for the few free, while dom, encapsulates the rest of us idiots who believed in the integrity, and decency of our leaders. but then i forget myself, we have actually attained freedom in South Africa, based on this rather rudimentary analysis....hallelujah.
i suggest opening the links on this blog, and it will effectively show the idiots we are breeding in south Africa. Julius, cannot be blamed on outcomes based education, to his credit he has no education,..but this does not bode well for the future.
however we do great adds even when lampooning ourselves.
things in South Africa seem to remain the same for a huge period of time.
lets see:
1. julius malema, has grown even dumber than before,mmmm, thats a change. his bigotry is so asinine and i thought we had outgrown that symptom.
then perhaps not, i have not been referred to as a "darkie"/"koelie", in years but there you have it, the slanderous label headed my way out of the mouth of dare i say it a jealous female. so when you have nothing to say, or are just plain dumb, as is Malema, you should resort to racial slurs. it might make you feel better.
2. then there is President Jacob Zuma, who is visiting, rustenburg, and other unrest municipalities, where people are rioting, because of lack of service delivery, more like they don't have their finger in the pie, and now want some. the Pres however, has is task team of useless ministers, i will call them the "talk shop", appearances, make them seem more hands on, and effectually they will accomplish nothing.
3. recession is a new word for spending more tax payers money, it hasn't stopped all the freebies for ministers, free luxury cars, free flowers, free domestic service, free first class travel, free satellite tv, free, free, freedom, just meant free to be having my luxury cake and eating eat, and Marie Antoinette was going to feed the peasants cake,...she would be rolling in her grave now.
4.Electricity, now that is not free, by the year 2010, the average 3 bedroom house, will have a 3000.00 rand a month electricity bill. will the increase involve the mines, big business etc, who enjoy rebated electricity, obviously not. so here we are give or take 5 million tax payers, being further taxed,...do we mind paying the bills so that the less fortunate of this country, would have access to services, education, housing, we sure as hell don't. but, ...how much can you milk this cow, till she drops dead, while all the time her precious milk is squandered on maintaining the elitist life style of government, municipal,BEE fat cats, who higher yachts, have tv in their cars, drink moet, eat caviar, and the masses still languish in squalor.
5. then theres the sorry excuse of an education system, first year varsity students, cannot read or write in English. and now we should blame poverty, and lack of language usage, surely when you enter grade one, you should be taught in English, but it was that genius Kader Asmal, who made it impossible to fail a student, if they failed a written exam, they should get an oral, if they passed or failed that, they still got bummed up the ranks, are you surprised then, that varsity students, can't read,write,or do simple arithmetic, poverty is just the excuse to cover up, ministerial failure, outcomes based education my ass. you are breeding a nation of bigoted idiots, and passing the buck to poverty shame on us.
6. lets not forget Selebi, our embattled police commissioner, who will get off with no more than a wrap on the knuckles, the singing canary, Agliotti, is possibly going to come off the worse for wear, Selebi of course must still be on the government payroll. so what real effect will changing the ranking of police people, make to that corrupt institution,.. obviously nothing. And our army, lets not discuss those hooligans, if disciplined armies reflect the state of a nation, what do our hoodlums say about the state of our nation. surely by the time you are over thirty, you should have moved up the ranks or out of the army. thank God these guys are not having to defend us against attack, oh shit what am i thinking, we are under attack, attack from bigotry, greed,stupidity, arrogance, shall i go on.
7. where are the patriots, where are the good intentions, hard work, integrity, that we were building our new free nation on, well free exists, just in terms of material upliftment for the few free, while dom, encapsulates the rest of us idiots who believed in the integrity, and decency of our leaders. but then i forget myself, we have actually attained freedom in South Africa, based on this rather rudimentary analysis....hallelujah.
i suggest opening the links on this blog, and it will effectively show the idiots we are breeding in south Africa. Julius, cannot be blamed on outcomes based education, to his credit he has no education,..but this does not bode well for the future.
however we do great adds even when lampooning ourselves.
Friday, August 21, 2009
ramadaan mubarak
i have a friend who always jokes, no,no, not Mubarak...can't wish that on anyone.
Hosne Mubarak, surely has everyone running, to avoid, the Mubarak taint. so instead i should say Ramadan Kareem.
it is that time of the year again, and for some reason, i am not having a sense of the spiritual,perhaps the every day reality of life, is more adapt at occupying my time and energy. the gifts of dates have been coming in fast and furious, i would love to know how many tons of the stuff are consumed over Ramadan, interesting, i should google that.
my one concession to the food drought over the next month was to cook up a great jummah lunch, the effects of which are lulling me to sleep at my desk, but then its friday who needs to work right?
so here's wishing friends, family, loved ones a happy and joyous Ramadan. may you be blessed and come out all the better for it.
Hosne Mubarak, surely has everyone running, to avoid, the Mubarak taint. so instead i should say Ramadan Kareem.
it is that time of the year again, and for some reason, i am not having a sense of the spiritual,perhaps the every day reality of life, is more adapt at occupying my time and energy. the gifts of dates have been coming in fast and furious, i would love to know how many tons of the stuff are consumed over Ramadan, interesting, i should google that.
my one concession to the food drought over the next month was to cook up a great jummah lunch, the effects of which are lulling me to sleep at my desk, but then its friday who needs to work right?
so here's wishing friends, family, loved ones a happy and joyous Ramadan. may you be blessed and come out all the better for it.
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
3 years between them
pahad 1 and pahad 2..both reached birthdays in july. azad celerbrated his second and iman her first. i have the amazing joy of seeing little people develop. first everythings, solid food,steps,words.
Azad has his three word sentences, grandpa and Azad time, involves trips to the glenhove petrol station, to watch trucks roll off the highway, eat ice cream and get the car washed, the last trip, the car wash was faulty, so i heard "foi...machween bwoken.." in response to what is your name...he says "bik..boyee"..who's a silly billy? Dada...the list is endless and his mischievious streek just shines right through.
Iman has the cutest dimple and a face that is always wreathed in smiles, a temperate nature, that can take flight when bik boyee, harasses her, which he does for the hell of it. she has a penchant for the telephone much like her aunt, and i shudder to think what daddy will be paying in phone bills.
i avoid the television like the plague, believing that we can entertain and educate without use of it, much to my chagrin i have succumbed, The sound of music, popcorn and chips is good for a snatched 10 minutes, in which i can achieve a grown up thing or two. music gets iman jiggling and wiggling those hips, and cbeebies, can get you 10 minutes more.
suffice to say, that the kids are the most amusing little people, who keep you busy , and when they are not around we talk about them constantly...
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About Me
- africanfragments
- johannesburg, gauteng, South Africa
- passionate bout all things literary. dislike, stupidity and insincerity.